I don’t remember the exact line, but in an episode of House, Dr. House says something like, “As long as they don’t hurt us, secrets can keep us warm.” Although I have been transparent in much of my writing on this blog, much about me remains unrevealed.
I will tell you that starting in my teens I have suffered from bouts of depression and/or existential crises. After I married they became less frequent and the move to Arizona has also elevated my mood. I have been lucky to have had some great help, most notably the late Richard Segal. I beseech you to seek help if you are chronically depressed.
Why am I writing about this today? One of my “secrets” is that I read and absorb information unusually quickly. The most recent example is that I read all of Matthew Perry’s book (Friends, Lovers, And The Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir) in one day.
In some ways, Perry is brutally honest about his long battle with substance abuse, including the many ways in which he tried to keep his problems hidden from those around him. However, I found his deus ex machina revelations which he claims will keep him from ever abusing drugs again to be facile and insincere. I am reluctant to write this, but after reading about the extent of his addictions, I will not be surprised if he doesn’t live to see 60. Of course, I hope I am wrong.
I know that in Western society men are not supposed to show “weakness.” Perry’s battle with substance abuse began in his teens, an age when a male is just not going to seek therapy. A secret, though, is that therapy–even on an occasional basis–can be very helpful. Concepts I learned from Richard Segal still help me today; he has been dead for 5 years and I hadn’t spoken to him for at least two or three years before he died.
Two days ago I wrote about my hope that this blog reaches x0,000 views for the year. That exact number will remain a secret. My revealing that wish and asking for help in getting there seems to have backfired, frankly. Yesterday the blog had the fewest views for a day with a post in at least the last month.
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I look forward to the Tennessee-Georgia college football game later today. The Volunteers are ranked Number One in the first “official” College Football Playoff (CFP) rankings while the Bulldogs, the defending national champions, are ranked third.
The SEC, the conference to which both teams belong, is so strong and so highly regarded that it is more than a longshot that today’s losing team could still be among the four chosen at the end of the season to be in the CFP.
Oh, I still miss not having any more computer football games to play in the just completed season, but that feeling lessens every day.
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