I was going to title this post “The Johnny Astro Syndrome.” Dr. Zal and my wonderful wife will understand the reference, but I will have to explain it to the rest of you.
When I was very young I once bought a toy called Johnny Astro. I did not grow up with money so I could not buy toys whenever I wanted. My next-door neighbor, son of the awful neighbor I wrote about here and no prize himself, bought the same toy the same day from the same store. His Johnny Astro worked, mine didn’t.
In my teens I began to refer to all of the “crap gone wrong” in my life as the Johnny Astro Syndrome. Maybe I am just hyper-sensitive to the things that go wrong in life, but it seemed to me as though I could almost never have an experience where everything went smoothly from A to Z. It seemed to me as if other people did enjoy those experiences.
An example: I bought Grover Washington Jr.’s album “Mister Magic.” However, when I opened the package it was actually an album by a group called the Dowlings. No one I knew had ever had that happen to them.
Another example: when we moved into a brand new house in Texas I had DirecTV installed as I had been a subscriber for about four years. I had to have NFL Sunday Ticket. For the first two weeks everything was fine, but then the receiver in the media room would just re-boot itself at random times. Calls to customer service proved futile as the representatives did not believe me when I said I was not re-booting the receiver. Finally after a few weeks, after raising my voice and demanding a supervisor, a tech was sent and fixed the problem, which he said was caused by an improper install. These are just two of what I would swear are hundreds of examples of crap gone wrong.
OK, so why am I writing about this today? I mentioned that I purchased Action! PC Football and was going to open the envelope containing the flash drive with the game. What I haven’t told you is that I paid more money for a flash drive version because the last two years I purchased the game via download it took multiple installs to get the game to work.
Guess what? The flash drive was blank. When I placed it in a USB port my computer displayed a message asking me if I wanted to format the disk, a sign that it was blank. In any event, if I had formatted the flash drive any data on it would have been erased.
I am also writing about this today because this is supposed to be the day I take my 2016 Corvette Z06 to a “speed shop.” This shop is going to perform some intake and exhaust modifications designed to squeeze some more horsepower and torque out of the engine without voiding the powertrain warranty. Can you understand why my primary feeling right now is one of anxiety and not of excitement?
Keeping my fingers crossed, metaphorically and not literally, that my car will be alright.
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